Secret Fear
by SunKrux
Summary: *COMPLETE* Wraps up two eps,


Secret Fear  
  
By: SunKrux  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own them, just borrowing them for a bit. The words well, they are mine…so is the idea behind this fanfic. I promise to return them when finished.  
  
Rating: PG (language)  
  
Notes: This is my first TLW fanfic...so please, be gentle with me. Takes places at the end of The Secret. I don't know if this has happened yet…but my muse *waves to her muse, Marguerite, who's sitting smugly in the back* has a way of bea…I mean, making me write very late at night. This is what she thinks could have happened between Marguerite & Roxton. Marguerite reveals to Roxton what she went through in Cave of Fear. If you would like to archive this fanfic, please e-mail me: sunaeryn@yahoo.com to ask permission. Feedback is always welcome…be kind.  
  
Thank you. Enjoy.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Silently she crept across the floor, to the elevator. Don't make a sound. Don't make a sound. She thought as she unlocked the elevator and went down. She couldn't sleep, maybe a walk would help. It was dark and she knew she shouldn't leave the safety of the TreeHouse and surrounding electric fence. She didn't really feel like dealing with Ape-men, Raptors or any of the other inhabitants of the plateau. She walked around the TreeHouse a couple of times. It had not been a good day. It started out so beautifully. She smiled as she remembered dancing with John. It went down hill from there. As she sat recalling the day's events, she became sad, again. Sadder than she had been in a long time. She never meant for any of them to get hurt. Especially John. Tears welled up. She stumbled in the dark until she found a tree stump in the far corner of the perimeter and sat down.  
  
You're on your own, Marguerite. She recalled John's words and let the tears fall.  
  
You really messed things up this time. She thought to herself.  
  
He couldn't sleep. He couldn't figure out what possessed that woman to hide her real reason for funding the expedition. Does she think it matters to him who she is? Risking everyone's life for a piece of paper? He was still a bit angry with her, but he also knew how important the birth certificate was to her. Yet she stayed, why? He thought he heard something outside. He pulled on his pants and boots, and then grabbed his gun. As he made the rounds inside, he found that Marguerite's bed was empty.  
  
"That fool woman." He muttered  
  
Challenger had been woken by Roxton's walking around. He came out of his sleeping quarters to see Roxton heading for the elevator.  
  
"Roxton, what's the matter?" he asked  
  
Roxton was calling the elevator back up,  
  
"Marguerite is missing. Probably off hunting for gems." He said, entering the elevator.  
  
"Now Roxton, you don't believe that. She is bold, not stupid." Challenger said as Roxton went down.  
  
Once down, he grabbed a torch and lit it. First he checked the gate. It was still locked.  
  
"Where could she have gone?" he wondered as he started walking around the perimeter of the fence.  
  
Marguerite was sitting in the dark crying. She had told herself she wouldn't, but she had been so close. She heard the elevator.  
  
Great, that'll be John or Challenger to come lecture me on the dangers of going out at night. She muttered, wiping her face, hoping whoever it was wouldn't notice she had been crying. She stiffened up, ready to take on who ever it was.  
  
"Marguerite? Marguerite, are you out here?" John called  
  
She didn't answer, hoping he'd give up and go back inside.  
  
"Damn you, Marguerite, where are you?" he called again  
  
She sat still not moving.  
  
"Marguerite, come on. It's cold out here." John tried again.  
  
"Then go back inside." He heard from the darkness.  
  
"This isn't funny. Where are you?" he demanded.  
  
She sighed, silently. She could tell he was getting angry.  
  
"Marguerite, come on, let's go back inside." John called again  
  
"You go. I'm perfectly fine out here." She shot back. Actually, she was getting quite cold, but she wasn't about to let him know.  
  
"You're being stubborn, you know." he said as he continued his walk around the perimeter.  
  
Marguerite sucked in a breath, like she'd been hit,  
  
"You knew that the first day." She retorted.  
  
He finally found her sitting in the dark on a tree stump in the farthest corner of the perimeter.  
  
"What possessed you to come out here like this?" he said, noting she was in her nightgown and barefoot.  
  
"I needed some fresh air." She commented stubbornly.  
  
"You couldn't have gotten that from the balcony?" he asked.  
  
She looked at him exasperatingly,  
  
"I wanted some privacy and no I can't get that up there!"  
  
She stood up, too quickly and lost her balance. She started to fall backwards. She put out a hand out, behind her to break her fall, not realizing just how close to the fence she was. John grabbed her other hand and pulled her towards him. He pulled a little harder than he should have because Marguerite slammed into him causing them both to fall to the ground.  
  
Marguerite glared at him, "You didn't need to pull my arm off."  
  
"Next time I'll let you fall into the fence." He responded, gently pushing her off him.  
  
Marguerite landed on her back, and then quickly sat up.  
  
"That was uncalled for. A simple, please move would have been sufficient."  
  
John stood up without a word and offered her his hand. Marguerite looked up at John, then at his hand before taking it.  
  
"Thank you," she said rather quietly before heading back to the TreeHouse.  
  
John watched her for a minute, something was bothering her, and he knew it. Then he headed towards the elevator. Marguerite was waiting for him. They rode up in silence.  
  
When the elevator reached it's destination, Marguerite headed for her small sleeping quarters. Challenger was sitting at the table having a cup of tea.  
  
"Would you like some hot tea, Marguerite?" he offered as she passed.  
  
"No thank you," she said quietly.  
  
Challenger looked at John. John looked back, then headed for his sleeping quarters. Challenger decided he'd be better off down in his lab. He picked up his cup of tea and went downstairs.  
  
John paced in his sleeping quarters for a bit. Then he decided he'd get some answers from Marguerite if they had to stay up all night. He headed towards her sleeping quarters determined to get them. He was not prepared for what he found.  
  
Marguerite was sitting on her bed with her locket, trying her best not to cry. He stood there watching her as she traced the locket and whispered the inscription to herself.  
  
John started to leave without saying a word, but a squeaky floorboard had other ideas.  
  
He stood very still, hoping she didn't hear it.  
  
Marguerite looked up, tears in her eyes, "You think I'm selfish and stubborn. You think I only think of myself, don't you?" she asked closing the locket.  
  
She got up, intending to put it away. Roxton turned just as she stood up. They were very close. He knew she was hurting from loosing her only chance to find out who she was, who her parents were.  
  
"You can be at times." He said as she sat back down.  
  
He noticed that she stiffened at his response. He could see that another tear rolled down her cheek. He sat down beside her on the bed. Marguerite was still caressing the locket. John reached for it. Marguerite pulled away.  
  
"This is the only thing I have left of them." She said through tears.  
  
He knew the locket had been part of her ordeal in that cave they entered to retrieve the remains of LeBrand.  
  
"Why didn't you ever talk about what you saw when we went after LeBrand's remains?" he asked softly.  
  
A small sob escaped from Marguerite. She had tried to forget that. It had been too painful.  
  
"What makes you think I want to talk about it now?" she asked looking at the locket again.  
  
"You've been awfully quiet since Veronica left. You've also been fiddling with that locket." John said, hoping she'd look up.  
  
Marguerite sighed. She looked up, but not at Roxton. She took a breath.  
  
"I haven't talked about it because I'm afraid it's true." She said quietly  
  
John looked at her a moment,  
  
"Afraid what is true? What happened in that cave?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"What did you see?" he gently asked  
  
Marguerite bit her lower lip before going on,  
  
"My mother. Or rather what I've imagined her to be."  
  
"What did she say?"  
  
Marguerite looked at John, fresh tears in her eyes. She shook her head no,  
  
"I can't, won't talk about it."  
  
"Marguerite, you know it wasn't real."  
  
"Yes, I know that!" she almost shouted  
  
"Then wha…" he started but Marguerite cut him off,  
  
"I'm afraid she's right."  
  
"Right about what?" he prodded  
  
"Me."  
  
He watched her face. She was struggling to maintain composer, but she was slowly loosing the battle.  
  
"What about you? What did she tell you?"  
  
Marguerite wiped a tear from her face and took a deep breath.  
  
"She told me why they gave me up."  
  
She looks so lost, he thought to himself.  
  
"Why did they?" he was hesitant to ask.  
  
"She told me I had been a stubborn baby. That she knew right away that I was different and that there was something wrong with me. That I was evil." Marguerite managed to get out. She got off the bed. She needed to get away. Away before John confirmed her fear. That fear that she was evil and that's why no one, not even her parents could or would ever love her.  
  
John gently grabbed her hand, sensing her need to run.  
  
"Let go, please."  
  
"What else did she say?" John asked, still holding her hand. He wasn't about to let her run. He knew the only way she would get past this demon was to face it.  
  
"She handed me my Christening blanket. She told me that I knew what needed to be done. When I started to unfold it, there was a gun. She told me this wasn't my world, that I didn't belong and I knew what needed to be done." Marguerite told John.  
  
She had managed to get free of his hold. She had her back to him. He just sat there, not sure what to do or say. He stood up and walked over to Marguerite. He put his hands on her shoulders and turned her to face him. She was looking at the floor, tears streaming.  
  
"That's when I found you, about to pull the trigger. You were upset that I took the gun away. Marguerite were you, are you so afraid that no one loves you, you would rather die?"  
  
Marguerite sucked in a breath before looking up at John.  
  
"Sometimes. Even you think I'm a horrible person. That I'm selfish and always looking out for myself. You've told me enough times."  
  
"Marguerite, I…" John started  
  
"No, let me finish." Marguerite interrupted. "For as long as I can remember the only person who has ever taken care of me, has been me. Everyone else in my life has either abandoned me or died." She finished, angrily.  
  
"Marguerite I was going to say that just because I find you selfish and stubborn doesn't mean that I …." John stopped. He looked at Marguerite. She was an insufferable, selfish, stubborn, pain in the ass, but he has also seen her more compassionate than most.  
  
Marguerite looked at John, he seemed lost in thought.  
  
"Doesn't mean what?" she whispered, almost afraid to hear the answer.  
  
John looked at her. She looked frightened, frightened of whatever he might say. When he didn't answer, Marguerite walked back over to her bed. She slowly pulled the covers back, then crawled in. She turned her back to him. She lay there, tears falling on her pillow. John walked over to the bed and sat down. He put his hand on her back and leaned close to her ear.  
  
"It doesn't mean that I don't love you," he barely whispered.  
  
She stopped breathing for a second or two then turned slowly to face him.  
  
"What?" she asked  
  
John slowly smiled, "Just because I find you a pain in the ass, doesn't mean I don't love you."  
  
Marguerite looked at him, then she reached up and touched his face. She wanted to make sure she wasn't dreaming. A small smile spread across her tear stained face.  
  
"Marguerite, it's late and it's been a hell of a day." John said, getting up. Marguerite reached for his hand then moved over, making room on her bed. John looked at her, rather shocked, but pleased. He pulled off his boots and lay down.  
  
When Challenger came upstairs he noticed that it was rather quiet. He had heard them talking. He hadn't been able to make out what they were saying; they had spoken rather quietly for the most part. He wondered if they were still in the TreeHouse. He walked over to Marguerite's sleeping quarters. When he looked in he noticed Marguerite's head was on John's chest and they were both sound asleep.  
  
The end. 


End file.
